The Universal Committee on Life’s Verdict on Humanity, part 1

Have you ever gotten the feeling like you’re being watched, only to look around and find nothing, and then just shrug it off as nonsense?

Don’t mind me. I’m just an anonymous State Department employee who has access to the most top secret government documents of all time. One would think that the CIA would be the ones hiding these, but they’re not. We have them. That way if the public ever did force the CIA to make public all of their most treasured intelligence secrets they wouldn’t have to because the State Department has them all. Ah, bureaucracy at its finest.

But anyways, what was I saying? Oh yeah. I just found out after looking through a bunch of these documents all day and almost literally having my eyes dry out from not blinking for hours at a time that everyone has a reason to feel like they’re being watched. We all are. Even now as I continue to pour through all of these fascinating pages I’m being watched. I never would have known that had I not been given the task of shredding certain pieces of information that the government wants to forget about. The fact that I’m secretly recording everything I read in a tiny little camera I have hidden inside my glasses kind of beats the purpose of recording. It’d make more sense to just stuff all these papers in a briefcase and say that I shredded everything. But that would just look suspicious. I mean, who just carries around briefcases anymore? I’d surely be chased down and shot to death by the FBI if they saw me carrying around a briefcase. It’s the same as carrying around a big poster that says “I AM A TRAITOR, SHOOT ME.”

But I value my life way too much for that. I think I’ll stick to the camera…

Remember after Yuri Gagarin went into space in 1961 and Nikita Khrushchev boldly told the world that there was no God up there? I wish I had papers in my hand to prove whether or not God does exist, but unfortunately the CIA doesn’t even have the power to breach the realm of the Almighty.

To be honest, the CIA is a big joke. I mean, they don’t have the guts to hang onto their own secrets so they give them to the most honest department for safekeeping, only to have the least-honest person on the entire government payroll reading through them all. I mean, even after 65 years they still maintain that the object that crashed at Roswell, New Mexico was a weather balloon. There are so many conspiracy theories going around about it being this or that, this or that that they should just open up and tell the truth. What good is it not letting the world know that the “weather balloon” was in fact a scouting ship from the alien Kingdom that crashed because of engine troubles? I’m sure most people probably figure that it was an alien ship in the first place. Why keep people in suspense?

So yes, we are not alone in the universe.  How do I know this?

Well for starters, I have hundreds of documents in my hands showing that intelligent, extraterrestrial life forms have made contact with Earth for thousands of years. What I don’t know is how we came to be in possession of this information in the first place. Some of it, I’m sure, came from the crash in 1947. Others must have come from other crash sites that the government has succeeded in keeping out of the public’s eye despite some people’s stubborn pursuit of such events.

However, there is a very interesting pile of evidence that is just so unbelievable that I can’t tell if it’s real or not. If it is real then I definitely need to make sure that I copy those papers a second time. While I’m doing that I think I’ll go ahead and give a general overview as to what is contained in these papers so anybody who might view this recording in the future will have something to listen to as they slave over hundreds and hundreds of top-drawer secrets. I say again, I do not know if the following story is true or not, but seeing as how the government wants it gone then I can turn it into a fictional story, which is something I always wanted to do. Go sci fi!

 

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